Encourage One Another through Prayer and Worship

Marital Intimacy

Glorifying God through Prayer and Worship

Pray that All Husbands and Wives would richly enjoy it

Living a Life that Pleases Our God

Awake, O north wind, and come, O south wind; Blow through my garden and let my spices flow out. Let my beloved come to his garden and eat of its fruits. (Song of Songs 4:16)


Richly enjoying what God has given us.
God created sexual intimacy and wants us not only to express our love to one another through it, but to richly enjoy it as well (1 Timothy 6:17). For it’s the sex act between a man and a woman which can bring about the most intense physical pleasure that two people can ever experience. For it’s one of those pleasures of life that even brings forth new life. So, this being the case, doesn't it make sense that God would want us to richly enjoy it? Unfortunately, there are those who look down upon it and try to restrict it or even limit it to a set of rules and regulations. But why would anyone want to restrict something that is not only pleasurable, but beneficial for those who partake of it? For we have seen in the Catholic Church the unfortunate results of those who have given heed to the doctrine of devils and restricted themselves from marriage. For God’s word says: “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled” which means marriage is good for everyone and that sexual intimacy is not to be viewed as dirty, defiling or unholy (Hebrews 13:4). And let us remember we ourselves are here because our parents had a sexual encounter as well. And let’s thank God they did.

However, having said that, we still need to use caution when it comes to this area of physical intimacy. For it can be so easy to take things out of perspective and focus only on ourselves instead of our mate. For we must not overlook the fact that sexual intimacy is to be an act of giving as well as receiving. For we are to focus on bringing pleasure to our spouse who in turn should want to bring pleasure to us. It can truly be a beautiful act when the couple has this attitude of giving to one another. Also, we need to be careful not to fall into uncontrolled lust and end up sinning against God and hurting others as well as ourselves. Because remember, if you live for pleasure you will die, but if you live for God, he will give you all things to enjoy in their proper time and place (1 Timothy 5:6) That’s why we need the Holy Spirit daily to help us put all these things into their proper perspective. His Word tells us to walk after the Spirit so that we can put off the deeds of the flesh. Therefore, let us always read and meditate on his Word and be doers of it. Amen.

Now the Spirit expressly says that in latter times some will depart from the faith, giving heed to deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons, speaking lies in hypocrisy, having their own conscience seared with a hot iron, forbidding to marry, [and commanding] to abstain from foods which God created to be received with thanksgiving by those who believe and know the truth. (1 Timothy 4:1-3)

It was the medieval Roman Catholic attitude that marriage was inferior to celibacy, that all sexual contact between marital partners was a necessary evil to propagate the human race, and that a procreative act that involved passion was inherently sinful. This negative view was rooted in the ancient church and based on the writings of such notables as Tertullian, Ambrose, and Jerome, all of whom believed that, even within marriage, intercourse necessarily involved sin. This attitude toward marital intimacy, which dominated the church for more than ten centuries, inevitably led to the glorification of virginity and celibacy. By the fifth century, clerics were prohibited from marrying. Two classes of Christians emerged: the “religious” (i.e., the spiritual clergy), which included monks and nuns who vowed to abstain from all sexual activity, and the “profane” (i.e., the secular laity), who, being unable to rise to the noble heights of virginity or celibacy, were conceded the right to marry.
From Nathan W. Bingham Feb 14, 2014 Category: Articles.  

To see the full article on this which includes "The Puritan's View on Marital intimacy"  (click on this link)

Unfortunately, this Roman Catholic way of thinking is still prevalent in the modern church today, not only in the Catholic church, but also in the non-Catholic as well. It has brainwashed us to view sex as dirty and defiling even with our own spouses. We're afraid to talk about it as though the words themselves were evil, even concelling it from our kids in such a way that they also end up feeling that it's wrong; but of course, we know this is not true. God created it to be richly enjoyed and even dedicating a whole book (Song of Songs) that describes lovemaking in a poetic fashion. So, let's break away from our false views of sex and come to a place where we can embrace it and richly enjoy it as God intended.


Now that being said, we must keep in mind that not everybody is at the same level of faith when it comes to sexual intimacy. For some, being more weak in faith may limit themselves to some simple basics, while others faith allows them to totally indulge in a “anything goes” mentality. So that being said, we need to be careful not to put a stumbling block nor a guilt trip on a fellow Christian. What I mean is this; those who limit themselves to the basics, should not condemn those who do otherwise. And in the same way, those who indulge in it should not look down on those who don’t. For we need to take heed to what God’s word says and leave all judgment up to God. For it's before Him that we stand or fall; and according to His word, He will make us stand (Romans 14) So, wherever your faith may allow you to go in your sexual intimacy, you should richly enjoy it and give thanks to God for it.

The Song of Song
There is a book in the Bible that gives us some beautiful teachings on marital love and it’s called Song of Songs. Though some may try to tone it down, you can’t escape the beautiful descriptions of marital love and sexual intimacy that is laced throughout it. It’s like a lovers manual that is handed over to us from God, rich in picturesque imagery that can bring new spark to your marriage.

Below are some example we read in Song of Songs of marital intimacy:

  • My beloved is to me a bundle of myrrh; He shall take rest in between my breasts. (1:13)
  • As the apple among the trees of the woods, so is my beloved among the sons. I desired to be in his shadow and to sit down; And his fruit was sweet in my mouth. (2:3)
  • His left hand shall be under my head, and his right hand shall embrace me. (2:6)
  • Awake, O north wind, and come, O south wind; Blow through my garden and let my spices flow out. Let my beloved come to his garden and eat of its fruits.
  • How fair and how pleasant you are, O love, with your delights! This stature of yours is like a palm tree, And your breasts like its clusters. I said, "I will go up to the palm tree, I will take hold of its branches." Let now your breasts be like clusters of the vine, The fragrance of your breath like apples, And the roof of your mouth like the best wine. (7:6-9)

Hopefully you all get the picture of what God is showing you here. So, I would encourage you to spend some time in this book and read through it, asking God to help you comprehend it’s picturesque images of marital intimacy. Maybe it will put some spark back into you marriage or even enhance what you already have. Enjoy!

Below are more passages that speak about or refer to marital intimacy in the bible. God is not a "killjoy" but He is the reason for our joy. Amen.

  • Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well. Let thy fountains be dispersed abroad, and rivers of waters in the streets. Let them be only thine own, and not strangers' with thee. Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love. (Proverbs 5:15-19)
  • Therefore, wash and anoint yourself, put on your best garment and go up to the threshing floor; but do not make yourself known to the man until he has finished drinking and eating. Then, when he lies down, take notice of the place where he lies. Then you shall go in, uncover his feet, and lie down; and he will tell you what you should do.” And Ruth said to her, “I will do everything you say.” So she went down to the threshing floor and did according to all her mother-in-law instructed her. And Boaz ate, and his heart was cheerful. He went to lie down at the end of the heap of grain, and she came softly and uncovered his feet. (Ruth 3:3-7)
  • Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. (1 Corinthians 7:3-5 
  • You are to be abstaining from all prostitution; each of you is to be aware of his own vessel, to be acquiring it in holiness and honor (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 CLNT)
  • Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge. (Hebrews 13:4)

Be Fruitful and Multiply

Now let's talk about birth control? Should we really be using it? I know that some may disagree with me here but, I strongly believe that the use of birth control in general can be an act of selfishness and be displeasing to God. For we must remember that babies are not an inconvenience but a blessing. So, any couple that are putting off having babies because they want to pursue a career or some other pursuit, should consider how God feels about this. Let’s remember God's commandment which said for us to be fruitful and multiply. But please don’t get me wrong on this. I do believe God allows sex at times without the intentions for conception. But again, our main goal should always be a desire to bring new life into the world. These same children have the wonderful opportunity to know God and His love for us, as well as experience the pleasures He has so richly bestowed on us. And let's not forget that we had parents who gave us the opportunity to have life as well. So let's not be selfish but partner with God instead and fill His Kingdom with children who are in love with Him. Amen.