Articles on this Page:
1. A Man and Woman's Role in Life
2. God Hates Divorce
But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, except for the cause of fornication, causes her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced commits adultery. (Matthew 5:32)
What is Adultery?
The word adultery comes from the Latin word: adulterari, which means to, corrupt, destroy or break up. So, adultery is an act against a marriage covenant, wether it be the husband putting away his wife for another, or a wife who is committing fornication with someone outside the marriage. Ether way, it’s a sin agains our God who instituted the the marriage relationship to be “to death do us part.” However, in this day and age, it’s anything but that.
The Pharisees asked Jesus, (1)"Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?" And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,' "and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? "So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." But being not content with that answer, the Pharisees went on to challenge Him saying: (1)"Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?" Jesus then makes a statement that I’m sure caught them all off guard saying: (1)"Moses because of the hardness of your hearts allowed you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, commits adultery: and whoever marries her which is put away dose commit adultery.”
Jesus made it very clear that God’s standard for marriage was instituted back in the Garden of Eden when He said (1)“He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,” and (1)“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” But because their hearts were hard (2)“and even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting" which would include the act of one putting away his wife as well. However, Jesus came to set things back to God’s standard by saying: (3)“But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, except for the cause of fornication, causes her to commit adultery” This would be through her act of marring someone else. And then Jesus finishes it up by saying: (3)“and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced commits adultery.” It could not be any clearer than this. The sinning husband, the wife (even if she’s not the guilty party) and the one who marries her, are all guilty of adultery if they fail to take heed to God’s word here.
1(Matthew 19:3-9), 2(Romans 1:28-32), 3(Matthew 5:31-32)
Causing Other to Sin
Now, here are a few other passages that Jesus mentioned concerning divorce that we should look carefully at. For He said, (1)“Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.” Did you noticed that He said concerning the man divorcing his wife that he “commits adultery against her” and that the woman only “commits adultery?” So, this “committing adultery against her” on the man’s part means he is violating the marriage covenant by wrongfully getting rid of his wife. For God’s word says: (2)“the Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, whom you have forsaken; yet she is your companion and the wife of your covenant. ….“But if you hate her and send her away,” says the Lord God of Israel, “ungodliness will obscure your thinking,” says the Lord Almighty. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not forsake her.” This also puts her in a vulnerable situation that could cause her to fall into the arms of someone else. Jesus further emphasized this by saying in another passage (3)”whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery” because it is assumed that she will remarry. However, Jesus never mentions that the woman’s action of divorcing her husband would put him in a vulnerable state of committing adultery. This is true throughout the bible. Because in all scripture, adultery is alway linked to a married woman, but never mentions a unmarried woman with a married man. So that being said…….
1(Mark 10:11-12) 2(Malachi 2:14,16) 3(Matthew 5:32)
The only way a man can commit adultery is by two actions. The first would be having sex with a married woman. But, second would be by getting rid of the wife he has so that he can replace her for another. Again, this is adultery in the form severing the marriage covenant, which is a sin in the eyes of God. So, would it be an act of adultery if the man didn’t divorce his wife, but just took on another wife instead? Well, if we would search through all of God’s word, we will never find any passage that condemns a man for having more than one wife, it’s just not there. Now don't get me wrong, I am in no way encouraging men to go out and add another wife to their marriage. For we can read in God’s word that almost every man that had more than one wife was confronted with issues. So, the ideal is, one man for one woman. And let’s remember that Jesus said, (1)“a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” So, even though God does not condemn a man for having more than one wife, going against His ideal for marriage is just inviting trouble. So, that being said, I know that there may be those who are asking, “why does the woman get condemned for having more than one man,” well………..
Here is an illustration that may help you understand why God would allow a man to have more that one wife, but not allow the woman to have more than one husband. Suppose that a man has three wives and they all conceive and bear a child. You will always know who’s the dad, and who’s the mom. But the opposite is not true. For if a woman has three husbands and they have all lain with her that month and she conceives and bears a child, who is the dad? Yes, I know that we have tests that can determine this now, but is that going appease the other two jealous husbands? I don’t think so. Someone is going to get hurt, and it could include the mother and the child.
Redeeming Your Marriage
So, for those of you who are the guilty party and are responsible for this mess, if you would turn and repent, God will forgive you. And, if it's not to late to redeem your marriage, redeem it for your sake and for the one whom you are bringing so much heartache on. So, all you men who are dumping your wife for another (or already have), please stop and consider the heart that you're breaking, and instead reaffirm your love to her again. And for all you women who have betrayed your husband but have not yet married another man, stop what you're doing and free yourself from the arms you don't belong to and be reconciled back to your husband. And just beware ladies, for if you do marry someone else while your first husband is still alive, you can no longer return to him according to Deuteronomy 24:1-4. So for your sake, you should avoid marring another man and be praying earnestly to be reconciled back to your husband. For God will never let you find any happiness or peace in the arms of someone else. There will always be that feeling of guilt which is the Holy Spirit urging you to get out of that relationship. So, for those of you who have already remarried…….
For those who have Remarried
You must relies ladies that as long as you are in the arms of another man, even though you’re married to him, you are committing adultery if your first husband is still alive. This also goes for you men who have married such a divorced woman. For this second marriage does not dissolve the first marriage. For did not Jesus make it clear when He said, (1)“whoever shall put away his wife, except for the cause of fornication, causes her to commit adultery: and whoever shall marry her that is divorced commits adultery?” This couldn’t be any clearer. So, please get yourself out of that relationship, even if there is children involved. I know that this may all seem awkward and come as an inconvenience and be extremely hard for you, but obeying God’s word is far more rewarding in the long run. For He will not compromise His word so that we can live comfortably in our life of sin. And let’s remember what the children of Israel did when they realized that they disobeyed God and took foreign wives who even bore children to them. For they said: (2)“We sinned against the Lord in taking foreign wives from among the peoples of the land, but now there is hope in Israel. Let us swear an oath to the Lord in this, to put away all our foreign wives with their children, as decided by you and by as many as obey the law of the Lord." And let’s remember that………
1(Matthew 5:31-32) 2(Ezra 8:89-90)
Don’t be Deceived
(1)“If we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel to you than what we have preached to you, let him be accursed. As we have said before, so now I say again, if anyone preaches any other gospel to you than what you have received, let him be accursed.” So that being said, you should not let any Pastor, Teacher, Preacher or even your best friend tell you that it’s okay to remarry after a divorce, for they would only be speaking heresy. And let’s not forget Paul’s warning to the church in Corinthia, for he said (2)“Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God?” And then he goes on to say “neither fornicators,” “nor adulterers” “shall inherit the kingdom of God.” And let’s take heed to what Jesus said as well: (3)"Not everyone who says to Me, 'Lord, Lord,' shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven.” And let’s not be deceived, for (4)“There is a road that seems to be right with men, but the ends of it reach into the depths of Hades.” Now, having said all that………
1(Galatians 1:8-9), 2(1 (Corinthians 6:9-11), 3(Matthew 7:21-23) 4(Proverbs 14:12)
God So Loved the World
(1)“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” And that is so true. So for all of you who are going through this mess, there is hope for you. That would include those of you who must get out of that adulterous relationship your in. For God will never let you have true peace as long as your in the arms of someone you don’t belong to. So, take the steps you need today to get yourselves back on the right path with God. He will see you through, no matter how deep you are in this relationship. (2)“Come now, and let us reason together,” says the Lord, “although your sins are like crimson, I shall make them white like snow, and although they are as scarlet, I shall make them white like wool.”
1(1 John 1:9) 2(Isaiah 1:18)
Here are a few YouTube link that speak on this subject:
Pray that Couples WOULD NOT go down that road
Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, (Ephesians 5:24-25 NKJV)
Man and the Woman before the fall
God’s “Very Good” creation of man and woman
And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. (Genesis 1:26-27)
From the creation account above, I do believe that before the fall, there was a natural unity and harmony between the man and the woman, each one knowing his and her place in life instinctively. There in the garden, we can see from scripture that man was a vegetarian and that he had vegetables and fruit trees that were pleasant to the sight as well as good for food. Here, there was harmony between the man and his wife as well as with the animals. But most of all, it was that beautiful relationship that man had with God, being not yet tainted by sin.
Man and Woman after the Fall
And He shall rule over Thee
Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. (Genesis 3:16)
Now for starters I would like to be clear on one thing and that would be this; that the man IS NOT better than or more superior to the woman, nor is she his personal slave. She is his companion and an important part of his life. For God's word says in Genesis that both the man and the woman are made in the image of God, which shows that she is not a lesser being than the man. We are all one in Christ Jesus and just as important to Him. The only difference would be our God given earthly roles that He bestowed upon us. We can see this in nature itself by observing that the males are generally larger and stronger than the females. This would naturally place the males in a place of dominance and rule over the female but again not in any way inferring that one is better than the other.
Now because of the fall of mankind and sin now entering into the world, things started to change for the worse on the earth. Therefor God felt it necessary to make it very clear to the woman that man is to have rule over her and she is to be in subjection unto him. Now let us not believe that before the fall there was no male dominance over the female. For we can mistakenly come to this conclusion by believing that since this scripture mentioned above came about after the fall, it must have been because of the fall. But God’s Word clearly states otherwise. For we can read in Paul first letter to Timothy that it says that the woman is not to “usurp authority over the man” because “Adam was first formed, then Eve.” Also, we have Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians stating that man was not created for the woman, but the woman for the man, thus showing that from the very beginning (before the fall) God had created the man to be head over the woman.
Now, according to the passage above, we read that the woman's desire is going to be for her husband. This is the same wording as it is in chapter 4 of Genesis where we read: "And the LORD said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen? If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his desire, and thou shalt rule over him. (Genesis 4:6-7 KJV) So we see that this word "desire" speaks of having ones will and way over someone else, but in both cases the husband as well as Cain our to have the rule.
We must be diligent to stand on the truth of God’s Word and not try to water it down with our own theology. It seems there’s that urge in us to try to twist or bend His Word in such a way that it would be appealing to all. And is it not true that we do this because we are so afraid of offending someone? And it is no wonder why we have such disorder in the church today as well as in our homes? It’s time we stand up for the truth of God’s Word and take our rightful places in life (both the man and the woman). For by doing anything otherwise, we would be guilty of thwarting a divine commandment.
Reference from commentators:
Giving Honor unto the Wife
And you do these things which I hate. You cover the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping and moaning because of troubles, yet still thinking it is worthy to look upon your sacrifice or take it as acceptable from your hands. And you say, “Why?” Because the Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, whom you have forsaken; yet she is your companion and the wife of your covenant. But did He not make another, having a remnant of His Spirit? Yet you ask, “What else does God seek but offspring?” But take heed to your spirit, and do not forsake the wife of your youth. “But if you hate her and send her away,” says the Lord God of Israel, “ungodliness will obscure your thinking,” says the Lord Almighty. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not forsake her. (Malachi 2:13-16 Sept.)
It is obvious from scripture that the man is to show respect and honor to his wife. Just because the man has a God given authority over his wife does not mean that she is to be looked down upon or to be treated as inferior. Does not scripture say that the man is to love his wife’s as his own body? A wife is a blessing to the husband and an important part of his life. In fact, in Proverbs 31:10-31 it says that a virtuous woman is prized far above rubies and is a blessing to her husband. So, why does one divorce his wife and marry another, treating her like an object that can be traded in for another. She is a person that is precious and just as important in the eyes of God as any man. For we can see from the scripture quoted above in Malachi as well as the one below from (5)Matthew’s gospel, that God hates divorce.
The Man's Place in Life
But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel. (1 Timothy 5:8)
According to the passage above, a man is to be the provider for his household. He is to work and do all he can to provide food on the table for his family and clothing on their backs. For God’s word condemns laziness and anyone who is a slacker. In fact, according to the bible passage quoted above, God says that such a man is worse than an unbeliever. Now that’s pretty bad. Now let it be said, I don’t believe this is condemning those men who are struggling to make ends meet. For sometimes things happen that can put people into predicaments that are out of their control. But in all things, God will meet their needs and see them through if they trust Him and put their hope in Him. So, let all of us who are men do our best by loving our wife’s according to scripture and help train our children in the way they should go (see Train up a Child). This would include teaching them the truth of God’s word and not to be harsh with them or harass them to anger.
The Woman's Place in Life
the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things-- that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, [to be] discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed. (Titus 2:3-5 NKJV)
According the scripture above, women should be passing on to the next generation the important role of being keepers of the home. However, we see the opposite happening. For young women are being shipped off to pursue a degree in some collage so that they can have a career outside the home which is not consistent with God’s word. Also, mothers are sending off their young children to strangers in some day care so that they can pursue a career as well instead of staying home and raising them as they should. Is this not wrong? Should they not rather be teaching and instilling Godly values to their own children instead of letting someone else teach them who knows what? Even the Military as well as the police force has open its doors to woman which goes against nature. For woman are to bring life into the world, not to take it out. Unfortunately, this is all part of the fall of mankind where women feel they need to venture outside of the home in order to be recognized as being important or even equal to men. But the truth of it all is, a woman's role in the home is just as vital, if not even more important than any job outside of it. For she has the God given role to "train a child in the way they should go" which molds and shapes that child's future. What job can be more important than that?
Now, I'm is not saying that all women have to be chained to the house because there are those exception to this rule. For there are single women as well as wives with no little ones that can be involved in the workforce outside the home. There are also those women who even started their own business doing crafts as well as opening shops which become a great blessing not only to their family, but to their community as well. And what's even better is the fact that these family own businesses allow for children to get involved, teaching them from a very early age how to be fruitful and productive in life. But again, these businesses should not get in the way of her most important calling. For a mother and wife's first priority is always to be there for her children as well as for her husband. This is not a commandment from me, but from God himself. This is all consistent with God's word as we can see from the book of Proverbs below. Of course, there are also those women who are single or don't have any children who are pursuing a career such as nursing or some other job which would be a blessing to her community. This is acceptable because she can still be there for her husband and not have to worry about neglecting any children. However, when children do come into the picture, she needs to be ready to give up her career to pursue her most important role, and that would be raising her children.
The Virtuous Woman
Who will find a courageous wife? For such a one is more valuable than precious stones. The heart of her husband trusts in her; She will not be at a loss for fine spoils, For she provides good things for her husband all her life. She weaves wool and linen cloth and is productive with her hands. She is like a ship trading afar off, So she procures her livelihood. She also rises before dawn and gives food to her household, and appoints tasks for her maidservants. Seeing a farm, she buys it, and from the fruits of her hands she plants her plot of land. Strongly girding her loins, she strengthens her arms for work. She experiences work as a good thing, “And her lamp is not quenched all night. She extends her arms to do profitable things, and she applies her hands to the spindle. She opens her hands to the poor and reaches out with her fruit to the needy. Her husband is not anxious about those at home when he spends a long time elsewhere, for all her household are clothed. She makes a double upper garment for her husband and garments of fine linen and purple for herself. Her husband is respected at the gates and when he sits in council with the elders who inhabit the land. She makes and sells fine linens and girdles to the Canaanites. She opens her mouth carefully and lawfully and controls her tongue. She clothes herself with strength and dignity and rejoices in the last days. she runs her household carefully, and she does not eat the bread of idleness. She opens her mouth wisely and lawfully, and her charity raises her children, and they become rich, and her husband praises her, many daughters acquire riches; many do mighty things, but you excel and surpass all. Desires to please are deceitful, and the beauty of a wife is vain; for a wise wife is blessed, and let her in fear praise the Lord. Give to her from the fruits of her hands, and let her husband praise her at the gates. (Proverbs 31:10-30 Sept.)
Now, for all you parents who are sending your daughters away from the protection and comfort of the home into college campuses and dorms. You might as well be throwing them into a shark tank and tell them: "sink or swim honey, and oh by the way, remember to watch out for the sharks." Isn't this true? For there is a world out there (mainly consisting of men) which has other interests in mind for your daughters, and believe me, it's not for their good. For there are night clubs, parties and all sorts of guys they can hang out and get in trouble with. Is that really something you want for your daughters? Don't get caught up in this corrupt system that says you need a degree to make it in this life, because it's a demonic lie. The truth of the matter is, life has gone on just fine without a degree in the past, and this for both men and women. So, my advice to you parents; keep your daughters at home until they’re ready for marriage. They can always help out around the house and find extra work in the local businesses while they’re still single. It's all for their good. Amen
Know having said all this, I realize that our current world system (at least here in America) has made it hard for a couple to make it financially with only one person working outside of the home. Unfortunately, we have brought this upon ourselves because of greed. A get rich and retire early mentality can bring a nation to ruin. So, we cannot put all the blame on the woman for what’s going on, for the man is at fault here also. Oh, wouldn't be nice, if all woman were as the Provers 31 woman and men as the Ephesians 5 husband.
Leaders in the Church
Let a woman learn in silence with all submission. And I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, but to be in silence. For Adam was formed first, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived, fell into transgression. (1 Timothy 2:11-14 NKJV)
It is very clear from the scriptures, both in the Old Testament as well as the New, that the leadership positions in the church are to be held only by men and never by a woman. If we look at the Old Testament we can see that all the priestly positions were never held by a woman. Likewise, if we look at the New Testament Church, we can see that all twelve of the apostles were held only by men. Wouldn’t it make sense if Jesus wanted to have women in leadership positions in the New Testament church, he would have at least chose one woman (perhaps maybe Mary Magdalen) to be one of His apostles. But it is so clear from Paul’s letters that no woman is to take on any form of leadership within the church assembly. However, the scriptures do teach that women can take part within the church as prophets and as deacons. Now it must be understood that this word deacon does not mean a church leader or teacher but one who serves in the church, whether they are man or a woman. We can see this to be true from Acts chapter 6 where it talks about Stephen who was appointed as a deacon in the church to serve tables (see: Acts 6:3 and 1 Timothy 3:8-13).
Now I know that some of you may be thinking about Deborah, who was a Judge and a prophet in Israel. While it is true that she was holding these two positions, this still would not qualify her to take on a role as a priest or a religious teacher. Prophets speak as God gives them utterance and Judges administer justice. But that does not give them license to take on roles that’s not given to them. We can see this to be true where a woman was never given the role of a Priest or an apostle, but only men. We must remember that even King Saul, who was an anointed King in Israel, got into trouble for taking on the duties of a Priest.
(Key notes of this article: husbands must love their wives, the husband is the head of the wife, and a man and woman's role in life.)
Pray that all would embrace their place
Glorifying God through Prayer and Worship
Living a Life that Pleases Our God